Boring worship services
A number of people have communicated with me about worship in their congregations, and their sentiments might surprise some people who are in church every Sunday.
The truth is they are bored out of their minds. If you've been wondering lately why people have stopped coming to worship, take a look at the Sunday services. Yes, it's the same old stuff every Sunday of the year, and some people are voting against boring worship with their feet. They're staying at home and working in their gardens, or they've found another congregation where worship is a weekly surprise.
The truth is, the pastor probably also is mumbling about boredom. The poor parson has preached into a full circle and fallen into the center pit. There is no escape unless a complete departure can be made from all former identities. And the pastor is afraid to change.
So the boring worship continues week after week into all eternity.
The other problem for the average denominational pastor is the liturgy police. These are the people who attend worship only to catch pastors taking short cuts with prayers or skipping entire blocks of liturgical material such as the Kyrie, in which people beg God for mercy three times.
But now, the end of summer is a good time for the lay people in a congregation to rally for changes in the worship -- because the pastor is usually on vacation.
I would not suggest to you that the pastor is a stuffed shirt, but it might be easier to make a change or two if her holiness is away having fun and relaxation.
If it's a hot day, the first thing you have to do is cool people down. They will come to church dressed for the heat, of course. But there is something about sitting in church on a hot day that will make a person's blood boil. So, as people come in the door hand everyone a Freezie. Yes, I mean one of those 12-inch long tubes of flavored ice that are so popular with kids.
This will be a big shock to some of the stiff people. But as they see others biting a hole in the end of the tube and sucking the delicious ice, they also will tip their tube for refreshment. I have seen this done in church and it creates a joyful stir.
The second thing you must do is get the music rolling. Don't be afraid of destroying the holiness of the moment with a little noise and rhythm. There is nothing evil about rhythm, and if the music gets too noisy, one of the deacons will hold a finger to his lips.
If you're afraid of offending the neighbors, invite them to join the celebration. And just for something different, invite the nearest competing congregation to come into your building for a feast of love. Oh my, what a Sunday you are going to have!
Of course, you must have prayers because people have needs that only God can address. So ask the people who have needs to suggest some prayer themes. And if they want to come and say the prayer themselves in front of the congregation, welcome them into the worship mix.
Now we come to the most abused part of the worship experience, the Sunday sermon. This is an exercise that has become so bruised by bad preachers that pulpiteers no longer have an exact formula for a good sermon. But since you do not have a trained preacher in your midst, the opportunity presents itself to create a sermon for people -- for the community.
All you need is five or six people willing to stand before the congregation and tell about their spiritual journey. Where they began -- as a Lutheran in Kansas? And where they went -- to a Bah'ai group in Ohio? Where they settled -- in a Baptist church in Delaware?
Those kinds of stories can stir a congregation to listen. And when they do, worship will be exciting and the grumbling will stop.
The only problem you have is dealing with the pastor when the vacation is over and his holiness has returned. Someone will squeal about the jazzed up service and the ice tubes, of course. So the head of the worship committee will have to have a ready excuse.
I suggest the truth: "Everyone was bored with worship," you can tell the parson, "and we decided to try something different."
Then just sit and wait for a response. My guess is, the preacher will smile and ask for a full report.
Clark D. Morphew
8-19-00
