JESUS GIVES THANKS

When I think about Thanksgiving, I sometimes wonder how other people in history paused for gratitude.

For instance, do you think Christopher Columbus got on his knees and thanked the creator for the three ships that carried him to the new world? I wonder about Marconi, who invented macaroni, I think. Did he stop creating long enough to have a quiet dinner of macaroni and cheese with his family during the third week of November?

The answer is, nobody knows. But one thing is sure - Jesus was always giving thanks for things in His life.

For instance, Jesus was grateful He did not have a dog. This is not funny. What would the savior of the world do with a hound? What could He possibly feed a dog in those days? Jesus had nothing; neither a bed where a puppy might curl up, nor a bathtub in which to give it a bath. No pup for Jesus.

Jesus must have been thankful that people were not always pushing their pets off on Him. How could He possibly refuse when a nice family offered him a little mutt from the litter to keep Him company during his travels? And we, too, should remain thankful that Jesus remained dogless throughout his short life. One guesses He got a lot more done.

Jesus was also thankful He did not have a rooster tail. I refer to that strange growth of hair that afflicts some men early in life. In Iowa, where I grew up, they were called rooster tails - tufts of hair flapping about absolutely wild and uncontrolled. My father would say, "Clark, comb out that rooster tail."

Finally I had my hair cut in a flat top butch and then all my hairs were sticking up exactly alike. That would have been the only solution for Jesus if He had been afflicted with a rooster tail - a full-head buzz job.

Think how the art in church basements would be different today. Rather than the wavy, shoulder length hair in the famous picture of Jesus, we would be forced to gaze upon a nearly bald pate and a fuzzy growth of stubble reminding one of a weed bed.

In addition, Jesus would be looking at the wider world and thinking about things beyond rooster tails and mutts. I believe He would be thanking His Father that most of the people in the world are sensible, gentle and kind.

Further, it is my conviction that Jesus would thank God that most believers in the world are not fundamentalists - not the crazed "true believers" who think their job is to blow up the world for their brand of god.

Almost every day I hear or read that this war is not a religious war. That's the craziest thing I've ever heard. Who are these fundamentalists if they aren't religious nuts who believe their god is ordering them to take over the world?

Of course it's a religious war. It is a full-blown battle between peace-loving people and fundamentalists who want strict control of the world.

Jesus is grateful for all the people in the world who have continued to do their jobs and carry out their duties in spite of the first and worst attack ever made on our nation. We are the steady force that will prevail in this conflict. We are the people who get to work on time, give a full day's labor and go home to raise decent families and serve our neighbors. That may not be the most glamorous life, but it is the American way. And Jesus thanks us.

Clark D. Morphew

Posted 11-21-01